I recently wandered up to the magazine rack at a local pharmacy in search of something to read. As I stood there scanning for my usual DIY magazines that often include instructions for making things like headboards out of a discarded doors (and of course we have a lot of those laying around the house so that sort of thing is super easy and convenient) and instructions for making a clock out of stuff you might find at the bottom of your sock drawer (like lint), I found myself curiously drawn to a few of those teenie-bopper magazines. You know the ones I’m talking about…Teen Beat, Tiger Beat, and Bop. The magazines many of us pored through as kids the minute they hit the shelf at our local Snyder’s Drug Store.
As I studied a few of the magazines that weren’t hermetically sealed, I noted that the pages were covered with “hotties” like Taylor Lautner, Cody Simpson (I honestly have NO idea who this kid is or what makes him so dreamy), Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift and of course, the boy that my son Noah would love to punch in the face, Justin Bieber. I guess they don’t look that different than the stars my friends and I had crushes on when were were kids: Leif Garret, Scott Baio, the Bay City Rollers…
What’s funny is that I was just telling my friend, Jean, about some of my childhood heart throbs –the boys that I would dream about as I gazed into the golden sunset while eating a bowl of Quisp cereal. And with Valentine’s Day right around the corner I kind of feel that confessing my childhood loves is rather befitting.
Okay. You had a secret crush on him back in the 60’s and 70’s, too. Who didn’t? I mean, every day when you got off the school bus you could run into your house and flip the ol’ Gilligan’s Island reruns on and see what this smokin’ scientist was stirring up. Yeah. I was like six years old but even then I knew a babe when I saw one. I only wish I knew his name (did he even have one?).
Now, don’t get me wrong. Although my friends pined over him, I didn’t have a crush on Peter Brady (or any of the Brady boys). Never. He was far too immature for me, especially after I had been in a prior imaginary relationship with a much older man, The Professor. Peter just wasn’t my type. He was a bit overly dramatic for a boy and I think what cinched my dislike for him was the episode when he did the lame magic show. And that one when he tried to look older for one of his dates and his phony mustache slid off? Ugh. Nice try Peter, but those desperate tactics would never work on a highly sophisticated second grader like me.
But hmmm….I’ve seen photos of him all grown up and Christopher Knight, you be lookin’ mighty fine these days.
I remember when my sister spent her hard-earned babysitting money on a half-dozen mail order posters of him and the minute they showed up in our mail box, the roll of Scotch tape came out and she had them plastered all over our bedroom walls. My mother was mortified. But let me just say that there was nothing more enchanting for an 8 year old than waking up in the morning to a gargantuan picture of David Cassidy dressed in a suede patchwork vest and holding a romantic daisy (sigh).
I’ve had a few other grown up crushes over the years in addition to the sizzling dudes from my single digit years including William Hirt, Fabio (yeah…kinda embarrassed about that one, now), Kevin Kline, Brendan Fraser, and Johnny Depp. I’m thinking that even as I eventually head into my senior citizen years down the road, the list will continue to grow. I have always been boy crazy and always will be. But am I the only one?
C’mon. Who have your crushes been over the years? I know not one of them could ever top Underdog.
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